Mary Oliver's Teaching

Instructions for Life

“Instructions for living a life: Pay attention. Be astonished. Tell about it.”

Mary Oliver (2017)

          This quote by Mary Oliver is one of my very favorites. I come back to it at least once a year—usually in springtime when the world is waking up and transforming. It reminds me too of Angeles Arrien’s Rules for Life: “Show up. Pay attention. Tell the truth. Don’t be attached to the results.” I ask myself, “Can it really be that simple?”

          I come back to these instructions over and over because they are from women I trust. We are given this life and set on a path. What we do with it is up to us. People come and go; they teach us, and we incorporate little bits of them into our being, and then we reflect their teachings. Our path twists and turns, and sometimes changes abruptly. We wake up some days not knowing where we are, how we got here, or where we are going. This is one of those times. There is great uncertainty, and as much as we say we are all in this together, we are not in this the same.

          Some of us—the majority, I would say—are terrified, because our jobs have gone away, and we don’t have the money to support ourselves. That is an awful feeling. I have been there, and I can tell you from experience that it is a recipe for sleepless nights, panic, and desperation. And, some of us do not have such anxiety because our income is secure regardless of job closures. We are not sweating this out in the same way. We have the luxury of staying home, even perhaps working from home. Simply having a home to stay in and work in is not the same for everyone.

          In order to begin to equalize these circumstances, we can show up, pay attention, and then, do something. We can give money to food banks, and if we’re young enough, and healthy enough, we can volunteer at those banks to sort food and fill boxes. We can also hold the ground for others who are so afraid in this moment. We can be the calm that they deserve, but don’t have. We can add the energy of serenity to a frantic world. We can pray fervently and sincerely.

          These measures will not cure inequality, but at least they will help. When we feel helpless, there is great power in helping someone else. I don’t know about you, but I can’t give millions of dollars to the global cause. I can, however, do what I can do for people in my community who need help. Thinking small and helping a few is still worthwhile. Just show up, pay attention, tell the truth, and do what you can. That will be enough.

                                                  In the Spirit,

                                                  Jane