Quiet Time

Trust Your Solitude

“If you have a trust in and an expectation of your own solitude everything you need to know will be revealed to you.”

John O'Donohue (To Bless the Space Between Us)

Solitude is a difficult thing for most of us. Some of us simply can't bear it for very long, and others have difficulty carving out time for it. This is especially true if you are a working person with a young family. It seems there is never time to just be with yourself alone. We become mentally and emotionally fragmented and our tempers fray because of it. Since we live in a majority extroverted society (about 75%) we are constantly at the mercy of our social engagements and the expectations of friends and colleagues. We have a hard time saying NO to things we truly don't want to do simply because someone important to us expects it. If we too often decline invitations and solicitations for social engagements, we are considered “eccentric,” or worse, weird, cold and socially inept. This presents a conundrum for introverts.

One of the downsides of being “a creative type” is that you require large blocks of solitude. It's seen too often as being reclusive, or being a hermit. But to actually see a project through, one must have wide swaths of uninterrupted time. Creativity is an organic process in which getting “in the zone” is necessary to allow images, ideas, words to present themselves and take form in whatever medium one works. But when we describe someone as “an artistic type” we aren't always paying them a compliment.

Whether introverted or extroverted, all of us need to claim regular time for solitude. It allows us to catch up with ourselves; to actually check in with what we are thinking and feeling. If we can learn to trust that taking time for solitude doesn't make us strange, or cold, or socially awkward, we will have more to offer when we are with other people. Also, when one is trying to make an important decision, or is debating with oneself about a move or a major change, solitude provides a clearing of the deck, so to speak. A clean slate with no distractions allows our soul to inform and guide our decision making. Introverts especially need that space because their way of processing is interior and requires silence. Claiming time for solitude grounds us so that when we reenter our social domain we do so as a whole person. Claim some quiet time for yourself this sabbath day.

                                                              In the Spirit,

                                                                  Jane