Inseparable States of Mind

 

Joy and Sorrow 

“Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. And the selfsame well from which your laughter arises was oftentimes filled with your tears. And how else can it be?”

Kahlil Gibran (The Prophet, p.29; Alfred A. Knopf, 1923)

          I am rereading Gibran’s The Prophet for maybe the 50^th time. I noticed on the face page that I gave it to my first husband on our 4^th anniversary in 1970. Like Gifts from the Sea, by Anne Morrow Lindbergh, I come back to it from time to time because its message is timeless.

          The quote above is from the prophet’s teaching on Joy and Sorrow in which he says they are always connected: “The deeper your sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain.” Most of us would rather not feel sorrow, myself included. It’s not a pleasant feeling, but it is almost always true that the same people who cause us the most joy are the same ones who also bring us sorrow. When something happens to one of our children, or to our mate, or to one of our beloved pets, it is our deep love for them that smites our heart. Only love can break or heal your heart.

          It is also true that they are connected in depth and value—if we cannot feel one, we will not be able to feel the other. We do many things to postpone sorrow but eventually it will come home to roost. And when joy comes, we want to hang on to it and never let go, but we cannot live in joy forever since it is always linked to sorrow. The smallest injury to our bliss can tip the scales and flip us into sadness. We can do what Rumi suggested in his poem “The Guest House:”

“This being human is a guest house.

Every morning a new arrival. 

A joy, a depression, a meanness,

Some momentary awareness comes

As an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!

Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,

Who violently sweep your house

Empty of its furniture,

Still, treat each guest honorably.

He may be clearing you out

For some new delight…”

(translated by Coleman Barks)

          I hope today finds you joyful. If not, then know that sorrow is not forever, there will be joy again. You can count on it.

                                                  In the Spirit,

                                                  Jane