Spiritual
Warrior
“So what
does it mean to be a spiritual warrior? It is far from being a
soldier, but more the sincerity with which a soul faces itself daily.
It is this courage to be authentic that keeps us strong enough to
withstand the heartbreak through which enlightenment can occur.”
Mark Nepo
(The Book of Awakening, p.56)
One of the hardest
hurdles in the world to jump is being honest with ourselves about our
own motives. We can quasi self-immolate, if we're given to that, on a
daily basis, and still not be real about it. We can say, oh, I'm such
a terrible person, I'm a lousy friend, an awful parent/child, I should do
this, I should do that, but if our motive in saying these things is
to manipulate others, and get ourselves off the hook, we've missed
the spiritual warrior boat.
Digging down to the
nitty-gritty, we may find that underneath all our excuses is simple self-absorption, self-interest. Now, that is pay dirt! If I am honest about
it, there are things that interest me more than being an attentive
friend, an adoring parent/child, a sacrificing citizen. Even if I don't
like that particular image reflecting in my inner mirror, knowing the truth of
it helps me add another chunk of reality to the Me I am constructing.
As we add awareness, our wholeness begins to materialize. It is both
good and bad, both dark and light. It is substantial enough to cast a
shadow, and colorful enough to be a presence in the world.
Does that mean I can get
away with being a jerk—since I'm now an enlightened jerk? No. What
it does mean is that when I'm doing it, I know exactly what I'm doing
and why. I don't blame others, or fate, or the difficulties that life
itself has perpetrated upon me. That consciousness is its own
governor. It sits in the background and monitors and guides, so that
our behavior changes out of self-knowledge and strength, and not out
of weakness.
Human beings are
endlessly complex. We have all manner of tricks up our sleeves and
smoke and mirrors to play with when it comes to getting what we want,
and to that end, we're perfectly capable of deluding ourselves. We're
smart mammals, and even not-so-smart mammals are wily, cagey
critters. If you doubt that, just watch your pets playing tricks on
one another. Just knowing what our particular schemes are, and
choosing consciously not to play them, puts us squarely into the
arena of the spiritual warrior. Our armor is honesty.
In the Spirit,
Jane
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