“I spent a lot of years trying to outrun or outsmart vulnerability by making things certain and definite, black and white, good and bad. My inability to lean into the discomfort of vulnerability limited the fullness of those important experiences that are wrought with uncertainty: Love, belonging, trust, joy and creativity to name a few.”
Most of us think that uncertainty indicates weakness—at least, that is what our culture would have us believe. Being decisive, authoritative, clear-headed and, above all, right is seen as strong and in control. I'd like to rethink that a little bit. Uncertainty is reality, if we're honest about it. It is a sign of humility, which, believe it or not, is a strength. People who admit to uncertainty are able to learn because they will allow themselves to be taught by others, by the world, and by their own experiences. They can admit to changing their minds based on what they learn.
Uncertainty is the basis of creativity. When we insist on having everything planned out and controlled, we limit what might happen on whim, on accident, or by chance. We become rote doers of the plan, robots of a sort, when everything has to go according to schedule, with no deviations. All the magical happenstance, the chance occurrence, the fateful serendipity is eliminated. Insisting on the concrete certainty of our particular worldview is the hallmark of a fear-filled society. It is based on lack of trust, and the unwillingness to be vulnerable. It leaves no room for grace.
When you are feeling uncertain of where you're life is going, what comes next, what tomorrow holds, instead of slamming down the gavel and proclaiming certainty, try leaning in to the discomfort of not knowing. Try seeing your future as an adventure in which you will be transformed—welcome vulnerability as a sign of growth. Ask for guidance from your inner Self, from the Universe, and from whatever higher power you put your faith in. And, then trust that whatever comes will be a gift. Maybe not the certain future you wanted, but the uplifting joy of freedom from fear.
In the Spirit,