Exercising
Choice
“To
pay attention is our endless and proper work.”
Mary
Oliver
Yesterday
in the Spirituality Group, we talked about the power of choices.
Specifically, our power to make choices that help us to function
better in the world. I wonder whether you've noticed, for instance,
the conversation that goes on inside your head at any given moment of
the day. We can get deeply into an imaginary world while doing
whatever else we're doing. Let's say we're sorting through the mail
that's come in over the weekend. Most of it is junk that doesn't
require our attention. Instead, we're thinking about a conversation we had
yesterday with so-and-so. What was said could be taken two ways.
On the one hand, it could have been a compliment, but on the other,
it could have been said sarcastically. I wonder why he doesn't like
me. Maybe I said something that offended him. I wonder what he's
saying to other people about me. They probably don't like me either.
And so on. While this is going on, we feel our gut tighten, our
breath shorten, and pretty soon we're an anxious mess—all from an
imagined threat—something we've trumped up in our heads that
doesn't even exist in the real world.
We
have a choice in situations like this. We can take the position of an
objective observer. First, pay attention to that endless conversation
running in the mind, how it goes from thing to thing, topic to topic.
One minute it's imagining danger, the next it's hungry for pizza, the
next it's wondering what the neighbors are doing out in their yard.
It is like a monkey swinging through the jungle trees. If we attach
to any of it, our emotions change from dark to light, from happy to
scared, and now that monkey is in control of our day.
But
we have a choice; we can stop that. We can first of all acknowledge
it—okay, here is goes, off and running. Then, we can refuse to go
with it. We can simply not attach to any of it; let it run like a
television or the radio in the background. Instead, we can focus on
what we're doing. We can ground ourselves in the present moment, and
if our attention wants to go back to the background noise, we can
gently but firmly pull it back to what we are doing in the moment.
Pay attention to this moment, focus on this moment, stay with this
moment--this is a worthy practice. And that's what it takes—practice.
We have the power to stop the monkey from dragging us through the
highs and lows of imaginary circumstances simply by paying attention
to what is right before our eyes, right now. We always have a choice.
In
the Spirit,
Jane
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