Simple
Civility
“All
of civility depends on being able to contain the rage of
individuals.”
Joshua
Lederberg
Civility
is not about being polite to one another. It is not about “political
correctness.” It is about simple self-containment. It is about not
carrying one's rage over real or perceived injustice to an extreme stance
from which one cannot back down. Civility is found in seeking common
ground—it is me thoughtfully considering you, and your human right
to be treated with respect. Civility is the foundation and
cornerstone of civilization.
When
civility breaks down, we see the kind of street rage that destroys
everything it touches. Civility begins and ends with individuals who
have at their center an abiding conviction that every human being
deserves to be treated with dignity. Where there is rank incivility,
entire civilizations are destroyed, and rogue states take the place
of legitimate governments. No one is served; everyone suffers.
Like
all values, civility starts at home, within hearts, within families.
When we treat each other with respect, we teach our children to be
respectful, not just to adults, but to their peers. We build
neighborhoods in which everyone feels safe and shares in the benefits
of community. We may not like every person we meet, but we can contain
our dislike enough to not harm or slander them.
Our
highest values are civility and concern for the common good. When we
hold to them, everyone benefits. Such values are clearly articulated
in every religious tradition, and in every constitutional form of
government. When we abandon them, we are in no-man's land where
anything can happen, none of it good. Seventeenth century English
poet, Mary Wortley Montagu put it this way: “Civility costs
nothing, and buys everything.”
In
the Spirit,
Jane
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