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Tuesday, February 2, 2016

Baby Steps

Making Changes

Sometimes it's the smallest decisions that can change your life forever.”
Keri Russell

Steve Jobs once said, “Things don't have to change the world to be important.” Sometimes, all we can take is one step toward a change that needs to happen, and then rest until we can take one more. One agreed-upon piece of wisdom that has come down from many great souls is that there are instances and occasions when we, as individuals, cannot effect change. In other words, it is not ours to control. In those cases we must change ourselves. Viktor E. Frankl, who wrote one of the most life changing books of all time, Man's Search for Meaning, said it this way: “When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”

In changing ourselves, acceptance is key. Accepting that a situation that exists is not within my power to change, is step one. Acceptance does not mean defeat and does not require condemnation. It means simply, “this is not my homework.” This situation, this circumstance, this person is not mine to change, therefore, I will accept it and do my very best to adjust my attitude toward it.

Too often, we insist on having our own way—our way being the “right” way, of course. Especially, if we've always had our way, we balk at acceptance of anything different. This creates intractable situations, stalemates, for us and for others. Stagnation is not a solution. In moving forward, we must accept and negotiate, take one step forward, maybe two steps sideways and so forth until a resolution is reached that satisfies. It's a dance, and not the march of an army. Sometimes small changes in attitude, a quarter turn rather than 180 degrees, make all the difference. We must start the music, and begin the dance.

                                         In the Spirit,

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