Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Speaking Plainly

Just the Facts, Ma'am

Exaggeration is truth that has lost its temper.”
Kahlil Gibran

When I was a very young woman, I married a plain-spoken man. He never embellished or used flowery words when he spoke. It was like living with Joe Friday from Dragnet. At the time, I was made restless by it. I thought, “Surely he knows that adjectives and adverbs exist!” But no. I was likely to receive a monosyllabic answer to most every question. And, more deadly than that, he did not dance.

Recently, I logged onto his Facebook page and saw pictures of him at his daughter's wedding. He was animated, he was dancing, and smiling and obviously having a grand old time. Something joyful has broken open inside him and released the demon who bound his feet, and held his tongue. Perhaps I was that demon.

Do you ever think of yourself that way? Do you look at life from the perspective of “the other?” When life is not going the way you think it should, instead of exaggerating the situation with “awfulizing,” with lamentation and complaint, simply ask yourself, “Who is having a problem with this?” And if the answer is “I am,” then assume that you also hold the solution. Our problem may not stem from the actions of another, but from our own exaggeration of those actions. We rile ourselves up, and then spew blame. At least, I do.

I would probably appreciate that plain-spoken man now—now that I've learned that truth can be told without embellishment and problems do not require blame. In these days of excess trash-talk and hyperbole, he would be a breath of fresh air. And I'm glad he's dancing, even if he's dancing with someone else.

                                              In the Spirit,

                                                    Jane

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