Laying
the Groundwork
“Do
not ask for love unless you're ready to be healed enough to give and
receive love. Do not ask for joy unless you're ready to feel and
release your pain, so you can feel joy. Do not ask for success unless
you're ready to conquer the behaviors that would sabotage success.”
Melody
Beattie (The Language of Letting Go)
When
I am beginning a new quilt, I first have to prepare the space.
Usually, that means cleaning up from the last quilt; sorting, folding
and putting away the fabrics, throwing away pieces too small to use,
spent thread, and bits of batting. I vacuum the rug of all the
threads and lint that have accumulated. Then I pull out the colors I
will use for the new quilt. Sometimes I make three or four test
blocks, or map out a design on paper. Bottom line, I lay the
groundwork for the new quilt, and it may take several days or even
weeks for me to come up with a design and color combination that's
right. Sometimes the resulting quilt is nothing like what I had in
mind in the first place.
We
humans...we're such a fascinating species. We want what we want when
we want it. We usually don't want to 'waste' the time it takes to lay
the groundwork for anything. If I'm hurting over a relationship gone
south, I want to plug the wound with a new one. If I'm sad and
grieving, I want to take a pill that will make the pain go away. If
what I want is a fabulous job, I resent having to spend years working
my way up. All of that is like trying to build a skyscraper without
first digging a deep hole for the foundation. It's like expecting to
water ski without the boat.
Recovering
from a bad relationship, or a bad childhood, or a bad work experience
requires time for healing. Sometimes, and I'm 'naming and claiming'
here, when we don't take the time, or do the hard work of looking at
our own role in making things bad, we keep recreating the situation
over and over. That truly is a waste of time. And, time doesn't have
to be wasted. When we do our inner work, we are laying the foundation
for a new kind of experience. One that starts out on solid ground and
can support expansion.
We
can have what we want, but we must first do the work of preparing
ourselves to receive what we ask for. It's not rocket science, y'all.
All it takes is common sense and courage.
In
the spirit,
Jane
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