Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Time well spent.


Laying the Groundwork

Do not ask for love unless you're ready to be healed enough to give and receive love. Do not ask for joy unless you're ready to feel and release your pain, so you can feel joy. Do not ask for success unless you're ready to conquer the behaviors that would sabotage success.”
                           Melody Beattie (The Language of Letting Go)

When I am beginning a new quilt, I first have to prepare the space. Usually, that means cleaning up from the last quilt; sorting, folding and putting away the fabrics, throwing away pieces too small to use, spent thread, and bits of batting. I vacuum the rug of all the threads and lint that have accumulated. Then I pull out the colors I will use for the new quilt. Sometimes I make three or four test blocks, or map out a design on paper. Bottom line, I lay the groundwork for the new quilt, and it may take several days or even weeks for me to come up with a design and color combination that's right. Sometimes the resulting quilt is nothing like what I had in mind in the first place.

We humans...we're such a fascinating species. We want what we want when we want it. We usually don't want to 'waste' the time it takes to lay the groundwork for anything. If I'm hurting over a relationship gone south, I want to plug the wound with a new one. If I'm sad and grieving, I want to take a pill that will make the pain go away. If what I want is a fabulous job, I resent having to spend years working my way up. All of that is like trying to build a skyscraper without first digging a deep hole for the foundation. It's like expecting to water ski without the boat.

Recovering from a bad relationship, or a bad childhood, or a bad work experience requires time for healing. Sometimes, and I'm 'naming and claiming' here, when we don't take the time, or do the hard work of looking at our own role in making things bad, we keep recreating the situation over and over. That truly is a waste of time. And, time doesn't have to be wasted. When we do our inner work, we are laying the foundation for a new kind of experience. One that starts out on solid ground and can support expansion.

We can have what we want, but we must first do the work of preparing ourselves to receive what we ask for. It's not rocket science, y'all. All it takes is common sense and courage.

                                             In the spirit,
                                                Jane

No comments: