The Good Old Days

Better Part of Wisdom

“Wisdom requires that we relax our hold on our picture of how things 'ought' to be, and learn to make peace with things as they are. We can only do this moment by moment, here and now, by responding with open hearts and minds to the changes that occur.”

                                                Ram Dass (Still Here)

People of my generation and older have a glorified view of the past—the so-called “good old days.” There were good things about those times; gasoline at twenty-nine cents per gallon, very little violence on television or in the movies, and neighborhoods safe enough for kids to play unattended, and walk to school. But there were bad things, too. Racial and class segregation, strict adherence to prescribed roles for men and women, unaddressed homelessness, uncontrolled pollution. The good old days weren't so good for people of color, or for people in need of mental health treatment. There was no special education for children with disabilities. A lot of the things we take for granted today did not exist then.

I often heard my father talk about his childhood, when children had to work in addition to going to school. It was his job to get up before anyone else, get a fire going in the wood stove, and milk the cows before walking to school. After school and on weekends, he worked in a gravel quarry. That was before the days of crushers and grinders. His job was to “make little rocks out of big ones.” The Great Depression began when he was nine, so everyone in the family had to contribute what they could. He believed that children of my generation were soft, and we were compared to his.

The truth is that every age has its own version of good and bad. My generation worries about the depth of violence in the media, and how constant contact with cell phones, computers, and video games is affecting the brains and bodies of children. There is an ad running on television right now encouraging children to be active for one hour per day—one hour! That's a head-slapping change even from my sons' childhood, when one hour a day of inactivity would have been a blessing.

Change happens. I have lived long enough to remember when the Democrats were conservative, and the Republicans were socially liberal. Imagine that! When change happens, we want to hold on to what is safe and familiar. The older we get, the more we make derogatory comparisons to “then and now.” But this is not helpful, either to us or to subsequent generations. Acceptance of change is necessary. And much of that change is good. I meet children today who are smarter than I ever was, and I have friends of other races, and other sexual orientations, even from other countries and cultures. Life is more open and accepting of differences. Women and people of color can run for President—and win! That would never have happened in the “good old days.” Once we loosen our grip and make peace with the way things are, it's a pretty exciting ride, y'all. Get on board!

                                                      In the spirit,

                                                           Jane