Childish
Energy
“The
first idea that a the child must acquire in order to be actively
disciplined is that of the difference between good and evil; and the
task of the educator lies in seeing that the child does not confuse
good with immobility, and evil with action.”
Maria
Montessori
It
is the nature of young children to be active and engaged for as many
hours each day as they are awake. They are learning every minute of
everyday. I recall asking the Pediatrician whether my first born was
hyperactive as I was on my knees, dragging him out from under the
cabinet in the doctor's examining room. He said to me, “My dear, all
two-year-old's are hyperactive. If he weren't, then we would worry.”
My
neighbor has a three-year-old boy and a sick newborn. The older child
has made it his mission in life to do everything possible to keep the
undivided attention of his mother squarely on himself. It's hard to
watch, and I'm sure he's exhausted with the effort, as is his
beleaguered mother. Everything in me wants to push the 'off' switch
on his ingenious back and give his mom a little break. She's very
patient, knowing that he has much to adjust to with a new baby in the
house. I feel my father's impatience rearing it's ugly head inside
me. He would have wielded the rod to “teach that brat a lesson.”
I've
written before about the child at my church, now five years old, who
is like an old woman's soul in a little girl's body. She sits very
primly through worship, stands at the right time, never twitches or
fidgets, never crawls in her mother's lap or begs to go to the
bathroom. Everybody in the church talks about how very “good” she
is, what a perfect little lady. I watch her in complete amazement,
and wonder what she'll be like as a teenager, when the desire to
please her mother goes out the window. She will have a lot of
mischief to make up for.
We
must learn a lot as adults about what makes for a good parent (or
grandparent). The parent who can allow for much exploration and
mess-making, who can redirect that outrageous energy without
squelching it. The notion that a child is “good” when they are
acting like a small adult, and “bad” when they are behaving like
a normal, inquisitive child, is a dangerous one, even if it is
understandable. There is a reason why we have children when we are
young and energetic ourselves. The work of childhood is discovery,
invention, and mastery. God bless the parents who can keep up with
this wild generation of innovators. Better buy some running shoes!
In
the spirit,
Jane
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