Friday, September 14, 2012

I just want to celebrate...


Celebrating You!

The bear went over the mountain,
the bear went over the mountain,
the bear went over the mountain,
to see what he could see...

The other side of the mountain,
the other side of the mountain,
the other side of the mountain,
was all that he could see...”
                                        Mark Levinthal

Remember this old song that you sang to your children? I do. We illustrated it with hand gestures—fingers climbing up the mountain, and shrugs for the other side. It is kind of what we do with our accomplishments, isn't it? Especially women, I've found. We work hard, achieve much and then shrug it off. We have a tendency to not celebrate ourselves because that would be bragging. Case in point—I did not walk at graduation from either under-graduate or graduate school. There were no after-graduation parties, or anything else except...well, the other side of the mountain. Think of it this way—when your children graduated from high school you were there. Perhaps when they graduated from college, you were there. Yeah...so where were you when it was your turn in the spotlight?

So many of us have a hard time celebrating ourselves. Birthdays are just another day of the week. We work our way up a corporate ladder, and overcome innumerable obstacles, close deals, raise money for charity, and a million other things. But typically, we shrug off our personal triumphs as 'oh, well, anyone could have done it.' This tendency to shrug it off is learned behavior. If you grew up in a family that made a great deal of birthdays and anniversaries, you have a tradition of celebrating, and if you didn't, you are less likely to even think in those terms. But learned behaviors can be unlearned.

Celebrations don't have to be expensive affairs. I've seen birthday parties for little children that cost more than a month's wages, and don't even get me started on the great American wedding! Please! Celebrations can be small and intimate. Treat yourself to a massage. Buy a new outfit. Have lunch with friends. Light a candle and give thanks for you. But don't just climb over the mountain and down the other side. You're worth a little fanfare now and then.

                                               In the spirit,
                                                Jane

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