Friday, October 14, 2022

Happiness begins with...

 

Real Friends

“You show me your soul

It widens a place in mine

Where I store treasures.”

Isie Hanson (“Real Communion”)

          My friend Isie writes poetry—obviously. Sometimes she responds to my blog with a haiku. She is also a watercolor artist. Sometimes, she even edits my mess, which I greatly appreciate. She’s a one-of-a-kind friend. Last week, when I told her I’d lost my copy of The Velveteen Rabbit, one showed up in my mail two days later. I’ve been reading it again, mining it for wisdom words. Here’s an example: “And so time went on, and the little Rabbit was very happy—so happy that he never noticed how his beautiful velveteen fur was getting shabbier and shabbier, and his tail coming unsewn, and the pink rubbed off his nose where the boy had kissed him.” (p.11) That’s how it is with old friendships, isn’t it. They make you Real and there is no need for pretense.

          My friend Ellen is having sinus surgery this morning to clear them and treat for chronic infection. I’ve lit a candle and prayed for her safety and for the surgeon’s good hands. My friend Dejuana’s old dog Chavez died this week, just laid down and stopped breathing—a peaceful and welcomed journey to the afterlife. What better way to go? He was Real, from being loved on, too. My friend Sharon is flying off to Colorado Springs this morning to spend a week or so with friends visiting places—Colorado, Wyoming, New Mexico—she hasn’t been before. She’s excited. My friend Garvice and his wife Patti are off to the beach for a week. I’m watching the tropical storm brewing in the Caribbean, hoping it doesn’t interrupt their much needed get away. I wonder if you keep tabs on your friends, too.

          Friendship is one of the most sacred parts of life. Real friends will tell you when you are being a pain in the butt, and when you’re looking good. They’ll tell you when they appreciate what you say, and when they disagree with you. Amy Poehler said a true thing: “Find a group of people who challenge and inspire you; spend a lot of time with them, and it will change your life.”

Friends are the bumpers on our bowling alley, the safety net beneath our tightrope, the lifejacket when our canoe turns over. They are there when we need them and when we want them, and sometimes, when they need us. They are there when we’re sick and when we’re well, and they have the grace to take care of us even when we’re difficult. My friend, Harry, created the coffee klatch when we were forced apart by Covid, and it’s still going two and a half years later. We’ve helped each other survive the isolation of lock-down. I don’t know how anyone gets through this life without fellow travelers who love them.

Perhaps Anais Nin said it best: “Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world begins.” Real friends loan us their wings when ours are broken, and I’m so grateful for them. I know you are, too.

                                                  In the Spirit,

                                                  Jane

         

           

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