Losing Sleep?

 

Worried?

“I worried a lot. Will the garden grow, will the rivers

flow in the right direction, will the earth turn

as it was taught, and if not, how shall

I correct it?

Was I right, was I wrong, will I be forgiven,

can I do better?

Will I ever be able to sing, even sparrows

can do it, and I am, well,

hopeless.

Is my eyesight fading or am I just imagining it,

am I going to get rheumatism,

lockjaw, or dementia?

Finally, I saw that worrying had come to nothing,

and gave it up. I took my old body

and went out into the morning,

and sang.”

Mary Oliver (“I Worried”)

          I swear to you, Mary Oliver scoured inside my head and found this poem! Do we all do this, or what? We worry-warts excel at manufacturing things to worry about—especially things outside our control. Our specialty is worrying about problems that belong to other people. Our children, our parents, our friends, our neighbors, that couple at the church—what’s their name? I mean, honestly, we can lie awake at night worrying about children in China who don’t have enough food, and typhoons knocking down trees in the Philippines—as though we can change any of it. And whales—what about whales! There is always something to worry about.

          Worry is a toxic emotion right along with resentment and envy. It will leach the light out of any day and make every night seem never-ending. And it’s static. Worrying about something does not move you any closer to finding a solution. All it does is make you tired while you’re trying to slog through your day.

          Here’s an idea: Give it up. Just resolve not to worry. Ask yourself, “Is this something I have control over?” and if the answer is “No,” then, as we say down here in the Bible Belt, “just give it to the Lord.” Then say the Serenity Prayer and get on with the business of your life.

                                                  In the Spirit,

                                                  Jane