Grant Us Clarity of Mind

One Day at a Time

“Grant me the patience with changes that take time, appreciation of all that I have, tolerance of those with different struggles, and the strength to get up and try again, one day at a time.”

Reinhold Niebuhr

          Right after the serenity prayer, “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change…” comes the sentence above. Niebuhr was born in 1892, the same year as my paternal grandmother. He lived through the Great Depression, both world wars, the Korean war and well into the war in Vietnam. It’s no wonder many of his ideas held a good big dollop of cynicism. He had seen the worst that humans could do to each other, and what nationalism could do to the world. He wrote, “Nationalism: One of the effective ways in which modern man escapes life’s ethical problems.” Evolution seems to turn in a spiral pattern, with each generation doing a smidgen less horror than the last. Progress is slow, thus the admonition to be patient with change that takes time.

          Niebuhr wrote, “Every experience proves that the real problem of our existence lies in the fact that we ought to love one another, but do not.” It’s as simple as that. And we know it. We truly want to be good people. We just have such a hard time overcoming our tribal values of protecting what’s ours and not caring too much if others do without as long as we can keep what we have. We have a conscience that tells us it’s not right for poor people to suffer, but we also have a dragon quality that says, “but they aren’t getting my stuff.”

          In the final analysis, we have not yet risen above our mammalian brain. If you’ve ever had more than one dog at a time, you know that they resent almost everything the other dog gets. If you pet one, the other clamors around for theirs—they shove the first dog out of the way so they can get closest to you. If you give one dog a cookie, the other wants a cookie, too, and will take the other dog’s cookie if they can. They fight over toys, pull and tug, and once it’s theirs, run away with it. This is mammalian behavior. And we are, after all, mammals. The thing that makes us different is our cerebral hemispheres. We have the capacity to override our mammal brain if we choose. Unlike our pets, we possess the options of generosity, altruism, philanthropy, compassion, all of which require rising above our instinctual tendency to hoard and protect what’s ours.

          I’m not pointing fingers here. It’s stuff I wrestle with every day. I’m lazy sometimes. I don’t want to see what I don’t want to see. I don’t want to feel bad, so I put it out of my mind. Here is what Niebuhr said about that: “Ultimately evil is done not so much by evil people, but by good people who do not know themselves, and do not probe deeply.” He was right. He was right about so much. It’s hard work to sort yourself out; to know who you are and who you are not. But, if we don’t do this hard work, we will go on as a species warring and killing each other and justifying it in the name of Nationalism.

          Now I understand why Reinhold Niebuhr appeared in my dream. He wasn’t done trying to reason with humanity. He wants God to grant us the clarity of mind to get up and do what’s right, one day at a time.

                                                  In the Spirit,

                                                  Jane