Your Own Reality Show!

 

What Do You Think?

“Much of this dance of life, this universal rhythm, is out of our control. But while we don’t choreograph it, we can work within the part that is ours, with the power that is ours. We do this by what we believe. If we believe we have to fight the entire world, that we’re separate and apart, and that for the most part those we meet will be our enemies, out to hurt us, then that will most probably be true.”

Melody Beattie (Journey to the Heart, p.141; Harper San Francisco, 1996)

          I keep harping on this Wayne Dyer notion that “you will see it when you believe it.” That we call into being what we most believe about ourselves, the world, and other people. Which is a complicated idea, when you think about it. It begs the question, are people really the way I perceive them to be, or am I simply making them so. I don’t see any of us, certainly not myself, having the power to make someone else “be” a certain way, so I have to think it’s my perception.

          There are several ways to get to the reality of what we believe. One is to consider what our family of origin taught us overtly, directly and in no uncertain terms. In my family, we learned to stifle dissent, to consider ourselves lesser because we were not wealthy, and to be cautious around, and suspicious of people of color, and foreigners. Those lessons were out in the open, but there were others less so—a superior and paternalistic attitude toward people of color, a belief that protestant Christianity is the only legitimate religion and all who do not adhere to it are bound for the fires of hell, that women are inferior to men and should not hold opinions contrary to their menfolk. To be sure, there were some “good” teachings too—that we should be kind and generous when possible, and that we should take care of each other. That we should be patriotic, and without question, believe we are the best country on earth. I could go on and on.

          What changes our dogmatic beliefs grounded in tribe, family, and nationalism, is exposure to the world, to other people who are in some ways different from us and in many ways, not different from us at all. Learning that superficial differences—like skin color, nationality, and religious affiliation—don’t make a person dangerous or wrong. When we move out of the nest and mold of our clan and kin, we discover that the world is full of differences that do not eliminate the similarities—that being different does not equal bad or misguided.

          When I read about the beliefs of Q-Anon and the conspiracy theories that are rampant now, I am astounded that people could actually think they are true—but then, look at what I was raised to believe. Wasn’t that almost as surreal? Do you see how what we believe creates our reality and shapes our interactions with it?

Jesus—2100 years ago—pointed out, “The kingdom of heaven is in your midst.” Do you see it? Lao Tzu, who lived long before Jesus, said, “To the mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders.” Have you experienced this? And Oprah Winfrey—a modern-day prophet—says, “Your life is a reflection of the way you think…You are creating your own reality show every day, in every experience and every encounter.”

Today, take some time to tune in to yourself. To ask yourself, what do I truly believe? In the words of Melody Beattie, “Listen to yourself talk about other people, about what life is really like, and about what always happens to you. Listen to what you say about what you can and cannot do. What you hear yourself say is what you believe.” And your life will shape itself accordingly. If you don’t like the way your life is going, challenge the way you think about it.

                                        In the Spirit,

                                        Jane