Friday, April 23, 2021

Don't be like me!

 

Frustration

“But I remember thinking that learning how to endure your disappointment and frustration is part of the job of a creative person…Frustration is not an interruption of your process; frustration is the process. The fun part…is when you’re actually creating something wonderful, and everything is going great, and everyone loves it, and you’re flying high. But such instants are rare.”

Elizabeth Gilbert (Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear, p.149; “Persistence,” Riverbend Books, 2015)

          No one loves to be frustrated. The one thing that can make me into a maniac in a nano second is having the computer do one of it’s “black-hole” impersonations and gobble everything up. I lose it. But in the creative process, one is always in a state of minor frustration. “What comes next?” is often asked. And you wait, and you try things and try some more things, and nothing works, and so you wait some more…until it works in its own sweet time. In writing, one of the frustrations, at least for me, is trying to “hold it in the road,” so to speak. Trying to stay positive when all-hell is breaking loose and I just want to scream.

          With any work, and with any relationship, and in any life, period, frustration is the name of the game. Don’t ever get behind me in a grocery store check-out line, because I am always in the one where the person in front of me gets a debit card rejection, then goes through five more card rejections while arguing with the cashier, then checks to see how much cash she has and then starts taking away items until she can cover the cost of the others. It seems to be a little joke played on me by some very sadistic gods. I’ve even been known to make up the difference in the cash, just to get things moving—especially since this particular shopper always has a little child with her who’s screaming its head off. You’ve been there, right? Frustration in all caps.

          Life is filled with frustrating moments, so it’s a good idea to take yourself in hand and manage your response to it. In other words, don’t be like me—don’t scream so loud the dog runs under the bed to hide. And don’t slam doors or punch walls or other people. Instead, step away, take ten deep breaths and maybe do a little bit of stretching. If it’s possible, do something else for a while. Take a walk, plant some flowers, fold the laundry, sweep the floor—anything to get your body moving. Make peace with your muse by saying some very nice things to her and about her. Then try again. If all else fails, call somebody who knows what they’re doing. In my case, the Geek Squad.

          I hope today will not be frustrating for you. But if it is, know that you are not alone. I’m somewhere smashing things and cursing like a bandit.

                                                  In the Spirit,

                                                  Jane

         

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