Imperfect
Love
“…I
have learned that most of the time, all you have is the moment, and the imperfect
love of people.”
Anne
Lamott (Traveling Mercies, p.168)
Thanksgiving is this week—the strangest one in my lifetime,
I believe. The pandemic has trashed all our traditions. Nevertheless, I am as thankful
as always for the gifts of life and family. I think, sadly, of all the families
who have lost loved ones to this virus. Thanksgiving will forever be a reminder
of that loss. No doubt, they will give thanks for the one they lost but will still
experience an empty chair at the table.
Thoreau
wrote in On Walden Pond, “I am grateful for what I am and have. My thanksgiving
is perpetual. It is surprising how contented one can be with nothing definite—only
a sense of existence.” I feel that way most days. Of course, Thoreau could
have walked away from Walden Pond and back to his family’s pencil factory anytime
he wanted. He spent several years in chosen austerity, and not true poverty.
The
quote above by Anne Lamott came just after she had written a prayer asking God
to “have some permanence, a guarantee or two, and the unconditional love we all
long for.” She got none of that from her heavenly father, but she found it in
the world, and most especially in the congregation of a small church that
pulled her up by the bootstraps and saved her life. That’s where most of us find
our spiritual roots—in the love of the people around us.
Even
though Thanksgiving will be altered this year, we can still be grateful. We can
take the time to realize what we have, and how little we actually need, as
Thoreau did, and we can extend our love to the ones who sustain us. We may have
to do that over the phone or by way of Zoom, but it is guaranteed to be more
heartfelt this year than ever before. It is in experiencing our poverty—at least,
the lack of abundance of family and friends—that we realize how much we
appreciate the love that surrounds us. That is our true wealth, and it is not
diminished by this pandemic. Are you grateful for who you are and what you have
today? Be sure to give thanks for the imperfect love of people. They are what
keeps us going.
In the
Spirit,
Jane
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