Friday, April 19, 2019

Sweet Intervals


To Call Myself Beloved

And did you get what
you wanted from this life, even so?
I did.
And what did you want?
To call myself beloved. To feel myself
beloved on the earth.”
Raymond Carver (“A New Path to the Waterfall”)

Imagine, at the end of our days, that we were as clear about what truly matters as the writer of this short poem—“to call myself beloved. To feel myself beloved on the earth.” Raymond Carver lived a hard, short life—born at the end of the depression, poor, he learned young how to numb-out with alcohol, and died from it at the ripe old age of 50. But, out of all that misery came these lucid thoughts:

There isn't enough of anything
as long as we live. But at intervals
a sweetness appears and, given a chance,
prevails.” (Ultramarine:Poems)

Whether you are young or old, nearer to the beginning of your life or to the end, periodically ask yourself this question: Am I getting what I want from life? If the answer is “no,” then ask: What is preventing me from getting what I want? If your first impulse is to blame someone else, start over. Whose life is it anyway?

Sometimes what we think we want is problematic. When I was young, all I wanted was...well, everything—in great abundance. When I got everything I thought I wanted, it wasn't enough. The problem, then, is not lack of abundance but wanting for all the wrong things. This isn't an indictment because we all do it—it's human nature to want it all and to think that if we get it all, we'll be happy and fulfilled. It just, unfortunately, isn't so. There will never be enough.

However, what there is, what is always there in endless supply, is love and acceptance if we allow ourselves that guilty pleasure. Notice the line in Carver's poem is, “To call myself beloved.” When we are able to call ourselves beloved, and to feel ourselves beloved on the earth, we will have it all, and there will be no wanting for more. That's the sweetness that appears at intervals and, if we allow it, prevails.

                                                          In the Spirit,
                                                             Jane


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