Evolutionary Leap

New World Order

“Because you are women, people will force their thinking on you, their boundaries on you. They will tell you how to dress, how to behave, who you can meet, where you can go. Don't live in the shadows of people's judgment. Make your own choices in the light of your own wisdom.”

Amitabh Bachchan

In human culture, the evolutionary movement is toward fundamental equality. That movement is very slow, but the evolution of our species continues to move in one direction only. In the United States we are going through a “course correction” of sorts, and it's truly uncomfortable. The Brett Kavanaugh nomination to the Supreme Court has brought to light in a way that cannot be ignored, the inequality between men and women in this country. I am not interested in making a political statement here, only in reflecting a little on my own life experience.

First, let me say that in my life, it was not men who imposed the cultural norms for females on me. It was my mother. In her mind, a woman's purpose was to please a man—not just her man, but any man who happened to be in the room. That meant, above all, that you did not compete with them in any way—you didn't enter into their conversations with ideas of your own, and you didn't take pride in your achievements, since that might make the man feel inferior to you. Your job was to build him up and support him in whatever he did. You most assuredly didn't express sexual interest. You didn't dress or act in a manner that appeared to be enticing. Now, lest you think I am condemning my mother, I'm not. I believe she wanted me to succeed, and that was how she envisioned a woman's success. In her world view, women who were proud of themselves were haughty. I remember her telling me more than once, “Get down off your high-horse, young lady!”

The course correction has been in the making for a long time. Women discovered during the world wars that they were capable of doing work that men usually did. They began to educate themselves, and enter professions usually reserved for men—law, science, engineering and medicine. Then, the feminist movement brought with it an attitude adjustment—women are intellectually equal to men, so there is no reason for women to take a backseat. Now, the schools of law and medicine enroll more women than men. More women than ever are running for political office—usually the province of white men. When my first husband and I separated, I had no credit. Everything we owned was in his name. I had a job, and he was in graduate school, yet he held all the financial power. He had to co-sign a car loan for me to even be able to provide my own transportation. That was in the 1970's.

Besides the financial glass ceiling, the thing that lags behind is the right of a woman to be a sexual creature without being condemned as a slut. I have to give credit for that slut-perception squarely to the church—Eve and the snake and original sin. From the get-go women have been perceived as the cause of the problem. Because she is desirable, she bears responsibility for any bad behavior on the part of men. This is still being preached from the pulpit in Christian churches. If she is intentionally alluring, then she “deserves what she gets.” A man can be aggressive and explicit in his sexuality, and that's to be expected—ergo, the Clinton affair, the Access Hollywood tape, the porn star and Playboy bunny fling—all just locker-room talk. But a woman does not have that privilege. In fact, when a women cries foul for this prevailing attitude of inequality, she is resoundingly condemned for “besmirching the reputation of a good man.” This is the course that is now being corrected.

Women are speaking up and that's disruptive and off-putting because we aren't used to it. I have to admit, I hear my mother's scolding voice when yet another man falls to the me-too movement, and I surely wouldn't want anyone to judge me by what I did in high school, nor in my “misspent youth.” But enough is enough; it's time to disinfect our culture with sunlight. We are undergoing an evolutionary change. Things will never be the same again. The future will be better for men as well as for women because they will come together as equals. There will be chaos for a time, as there was when women got the vote, but eventually, there will be a new-normal that includes everybody. Evolving is good for any species—especially humans, who have the ability to create and destroy. Hopefully, what we create will be a brave new world.

                                                        In the Spirit,

                                                            Jane