Winter
Reflection
“...What
we strive for
in
perfection
is not
what turns us
into the
lit angels
we desire,
what
disturbs
and then
nourishes
has
everything
we
need...”
David
Whyte (“The Winter of Listening”)
We've had true winter
here in Alabama this year. Low temps are now back in the 30's and
believe me, Southerners freeze when it's this cold. So we scurry from
our heated cars into our heated houses and go out as little as
possible. There are some “cabin fever” disadvantages to being
holed-up, but winter also presents valuable possibilities—time for
thought and inner work. In doing research for this blog, I ran across
this poem by David Whyte, which is all about winter
and inner work. The poem is very long, so if you want to read all of
it, you'll have to Google it.
The sentiment in these
verses is one I find myself circling repeatedly. It is the paradox we
all face of wanting to be our best selves, our perfect selves, and
searching in all the wrong places. “If I were slimmer, smarter,
better looking, more interesting, quicker-witted, cleaver and funny,
people would love me more and I would feel happy and proud of
myself.” So we put our heads down and push and push. And we may
achieve some dramatic things, but we make a mistake if we think
striving for perfection will make us happy and satisfied. It usually
leaves us hollowed out and exhausted.
Looking within and
actually allowing our deep insight to inform us, is not an easy thing
to do. Paying attention to what pushes into consciousness, and not
denying what doesn't agree with our ideal-self takes a lot of
courage. Listening to those niggling thoughts that surface now and
then, listening to the feedback of others, watching our responses to
situations that make us angry or uncomfortable, and examining our
motives can produce some very disturbing information. But if we never
allow these insights into our consciousness, there is no way to
incorporate them. If we can tolerate the discomfort and stick with
it, there's a chance of adding real substance to fill the gaps in our
self-image. As we become more comfortable with all of who we
are, the good, the bad, and the ugly, an amazing thing happens. We
feel solid, like there are no thin places inside, no dark surprises,
and that is truly a good (dare I say happy) feeling.
There's a verse in
Whyte's poem that says:
“What is
precious
inside us
does not
care to be
known
by the
mind
in ways
that diminish
its
presence...”
Diving deeply into one's soul deserves time and attention. It's not a pop-psychology sort
of thing. It's precious. It is holy ground. Approach it with
reverence. Winter is a good time to do that.
In the Spirit,
Jane
No comments:
Post a Comment