Wednesday, August 16, 2017

Seeing Clearly

Hindsight

...He thought of himself, thought of things that had seemed so important, so full of meaning when he was twenty, or forty...Red herrings and misdirection, all the characters and observations that seemed so central, so significant while the story was unfolding. But then at the end you realized that the crucial thing was really something else. Something buried in a conversation, a description—you realized that all along it had been a different answer, another person glimpsed but passed over, who was the key to everything...And if you went back...they were there, the clues you missed while you were reading, caught up in the need to move forward. All quietly there.”
Mary Swan

Good writers can tell a story that leads into a densely wooded forest with many paths. Any chosen path will lead to a conclusion that is different from all the others. They know how to drop into the story-line a casual conversations, or a quick glimpse of something that seems irrelevant at the time, but later turns out to be crucial. When you are reading a good book, do you find yourself leafing back to certain scenes, or making margin notes of things to remember? Sometimes, when the tension gets too high, I skip ahead to make sure my favorite characters survive, knowing that losing them would feel tragic to me. At the end, all the threads either come together, or turn inside-out, so that what seemed to be the most likely outcome was not at all. Good stories are deliciously unpredictable.

Hindsight is one of the great mysteries of life. Salmon can swim all their lives in the vast ocean, and still remember exactly which river they hatched in and how to get back there. So why is it that we humans, with our big brains, can live a long life and miss all the clues? Why is it that we latch on to all the wrong things, the unimportant things, and give them far more meaning than they deserve?

Remember when you were ten years old and the teacher scolded you for being sloppy in your homework, or not studying for a test. At the time, the embarrassment was deeply wounding. You thought you would die from shame. But looking back, what real impact did that incident have on your life? Was it a turning point? Suppose you had a love relationship that went down the drain—you discovered that the object of your affection was unfaithful or deceitful. Life turned upside down for a while. You grieved, maybe even fell into depression. You thought you would never be whole again. But here you are, and in hindsight you feel eternally grateful that the person came and went from your life. When you look back, all the clues to that deceit were there in plain sight, but did not register with you or you chose not to see them. Only in hindsight is the pattern clear. Many paths, many outcomes.

We can live looking in the rear-view mirror, or we can learn from our mistakes and misdirection, and move on. Allowing life to flow, not getting stuck on the rocks and riffs of past illusions and bad choices, makes for a happier present. Our story is just as complex as any plot in any book ever written. The very best we can do is keep our eyes open, and try not to miss any of it. The clues are all there if we have eyes to see them. Your story is still unfolding...so which path will you take?

                                                             In the Spirit,

                                                                Jane

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