Get
Real
“All
great spirituality teaches about letting go of what you don't need
and who you are not. Then, when you can get little enough, and naked
enough, and poor enough, you'll find that the little place where you
are is ironically more than enough and is all that you need. At that
place, you will have nothing to prove to anyone and nothing to
protect. That place is called freedom. It's the freedom of the
children of God. Such people can connect with everybody. They don't
feel the need to eliminate anybody...”
Richard
Rohr
Can you imagine dropping
all pretense, letting go of all egotism, and stripping out the parts
of your personality that crave attention? Can you imagine what your
life would be like if you had nothing left to lose—or at least
nothing that mattered enough to step back into the games that you
once played, that, at the time, seemed so critical to a successful
life. Games like title, status, winner, CEO, corner office, top dog,
the best, the first, the smartest, the prettiest and so on. Pedestals
upon which you may once have stood—precariously balanced by
selling yourself each and every day, and whacking off the bits of
you that did not fit the image.
I have listened to
couples in the counseling room tell one another what “you can't
be.” “You can't be funny in front of my clients.” “You can't
be an artist if it doesn't make money.” “You can't wear that outfit to meet my boss.” It always reminded me of having a
relationship, not with a living human being, but with a doll on which
one could change the clothing to create different characters. The
message is clear: "I have to be perfect. I have to be the most
impressive man or woman in the room. I have to be, or at least appear
to be, what I am not. And, so do you." How exhausting is that?
The Jungians call this
“being a persona-person.” Persona being the image you want to
project to the world, while hiding the parts of yourself that don't
fit the picture. When you strip all that away, you get down to the
real person, the authentic one. Not a Ken or Barbie dressed for
success, but a living, breathing, flesh and bones, head and heart person. Now you've got something to work with—the raw material for a
soulful, spirit-connected life.
In the Spirit,
Jane
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