Monday, October 12, 2015

What to Avoid:

The Cocktail Party Life

We are constituted so that simple acts of kindness...have a positive effect on our long-term moods. The key to a happy life, it seems, is the good life: a life with sustained relationships, challenging work, and connections to community.”
Paul Bloom, Ph.D.

Does anyone truly enjoy cocktail parties? I'm talking about the ones where you walk about, glass of bubbly white wine in hand, nibble rich cheeses off artisan crackers, and make small talk with total strangers, whom, in all likelihood, you'll never meet again in your life. I'm not sure when this form of social discourse evolved or why, but for me, it's the antithesis of “the good life” Dr. Bloom describes in the quote above.

We humans are endlessly creative in the ways we attempt to prop-up our ailing egos. We do everything in our power to be recognizable in a crowd of the “right” people. We see it in the halls of Congress, in cathedrals, churches, and synagogues, in the workplace, and in our private homes. We want to be happy, and we somehow think that being seen in certain places by certain chosen people will get us to the promised land.

But happiness is an inside job—a spiritual job. It comes from being connected, not to the “rich and powerful,” but to one's own soul, and living from a place of soul-expression. It is personal authenticity, deep-rooted relationships, and love of community that engenders contentment and joy. It is engaging in work that enriches one's own life, but also the lives of others, and it comes from sharing one's God-given gifts with a world in need of them.

Cocktail parties are, at best, a silly diversion from reality. If happiness is what you seek, jump into your own life with both feet. And hold someone's hand when you do it.

                                                            In the Spirit,


                                                                  Jane

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