Connecting at Depth

Soul Health

“We need people in our lives with whom we can be as open as possible. To have real conversation with people may see like such a simple, obvious suggestion, but it involves courage and risk.”

Thomas Moore (Care of the Soul)

Take a minute to think about conversations you have on a typical day. On a scale of 1-10, how would you rank their depth, with 1 being extremely superficial (weather conditions, how's your mom and 'em, etc.) and 10 being the deepest concern of your heart at the moment. Most of us would rank the vast majority of our conversations at best, 2 or 3. We're very guarded about how we reveal ourselves to one another, even with friends. Now, name the people (or person) with whom you actually speak from your heart. Again, I would guess 2 or 3, at most.

We tend to think of “soul mates” as our lovers—the people with whom we are mated, or at least sexually intimate. And while this may be true, it just as possibly may not be true. Our soul mates are those with whom we are most authentically ourselves—people with whom all the veils are dropped, and we are present to them without guarding any part of ourselves. Soul mates are rare, and may have nothing at all to do with sexual intimacy.

What the soul craves is genuine love and intimate knowledge. In any relationship where there is gamesmanship or pretense, there is guarding. If we are competing, if we are trying to hide our weaknesses, if we are trying to prop-up our persona, there is little that feeds the soul. Having a least one person with whom we can be completely real is essential to soul health.

It is vastly important to have folks in our lives with whom we are authentic, and just as important to be that person for another. Real relationships are a measure of wholeness. Certainly, we don't engage at depth with everyone we meet, or even most people we know, but having at least one completely authentic relationship is critical to overall health. I hope today, you have an opportunity to connect at your soul level with someone you trust.

                                                       In the Spirit,

                                                            Jane