Saturday, June 14, 2014

New Pair of Glasses

Seeing Anew

One's destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things.”
Henry Miller

I picked up my new glasses yesterday. They are progressive lenses, with correction for three different distances. They take some getting used to. Right now, I feel like some weird bird, peering this way and that, trying to see through the proper strip of lens. I remember the first time I put on corrective glasses at age fifteen. I walked home from the Dr.'s office watching the waves in the sidewalk that seemed to rise and fall as I put my foot down. Seeing individual leaves on trees high above me clarified just how much I'd been missing. It was a revelation.

Sometimes, looking anew at old situations and everyday events is like getting a new pair of glasses. You can think you know everything there is to know about a given person, and then be told a single piece of information that changes everything. You can move up to a new position at work, and suddenly you see that setting from a different perspective. Now you're the boss or the manager, and life looks all together different. Someone may point out something about you, or something you said or did, and you get a glimpse of how others see you that is very different from how you see yourself. It can tilt your equilibrium.

It's a good idea from time to time to check in with people who know you well, and inquire: “Tell me something about myself that you think I don't know.” Of course, you have to be ready to hear what they say. I once pointed out to my mother how her off-hand comments about people made her seem arrogant, and she was flabbergasted. She had no idea, and it wasn't her intent to be nasty, but through my lens, that's how it looked. We need to be aware of how others see us, not so we can feel guilty, but so that we can learn something new. It shifts our perspective, so that we arrive at a different, less narrow, destination.

                                                   In the Spirit,
                                                       Jane


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