Misunderstanding
“In
the whole round of human affairs, little is so fatal to peace as
misunderstanding.” Margaret E. Sangster
Remember
the words of Jesus when he had finished telling a parable story? “He
who has ears to hear, let him hear.” (Mark 4:9) He was speaking
about understanding. It is a fact that much of the time many of us do
not have ears to hear. Or, more clearly, we hear what we want to, and
discount what we do not want to hear. We put everything through our
own personal filter of meaning, and come out with something that may
approximate the intended meaning, or may be miles off the mark.
Misunderstanding
is the basis of great human suffering. That's why it is so important
to choose our words carefully, listen closely to what is being said
to us, and ask for clarification when we are unsure. It is far better
to ask, “Can you say more about that?” or “Please explain what
you mean.” or “This is my understanding of what you said, am I
correct?” than to interpret incorrectly and make assumptions based
on misinformation.
It
is human nature to hear through our own filter. For instance, if I am
a person who's been abused, I will hear the words, “Everyone is
responsible for their own happiness.” differently than someone who
has no history of abuse. We bring our history with us into our
present. Also, when we are going through a difficult passage in one
aspect of our life, it will color what we understand in other areas.
Low mood is a trip-wire for misunderstanding. Being cognizant of
someone's mood can go a long way toward avoiding such mishaps; being
aware of your own mood is even better. When we're in a foul mood, it
is far more likely that everything we say will be tainted. It's not a bad idea to warn others when you know you're testy.
Today,
put on your good ears. Avoid misunderstandings by being aware of your
mood and that of others, by asking for clarification when you need it, and by choosing your words carefully. It will prevent a lot of pain and suffering.
In
the Spirit,
Jane
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