How are you feeling today?

Staying Alive

“I would not exchange the laughter of my heart for the fortunes of the multitudes; nor would I be content with converting my tears...into calm. It is my fervent hope that my whole life on this earth will ever be tears and laughter.”

Kahlil Gibran

Many of us go through our days numb. Somehow we got the message that having and displaying feelings, whether joy or sorrow, is a sign of weakness. I have been numb myself. I wonder whether you were told as a child, “You have to be strong, so don't cry.” Or, better still, “If you want to cry, I'll give you something to cry about.” I also remember, “Wipe that smile off your face, girl! This is serious business.” Or, the line Usher used last week on The Voice, “What are you laughing about? Do you think this is funny?” paired with a nasty, intimidating glare. Some of us truly feared our feelings. Deep sadness wasn't tolerated; may even have been punished. And happiness could be a signal that the other shoe was about to drop. Some of us even felt we didn't deserve to be happy, so we cut off our good feelings. Walking through life without emotions is akin to being a zombie. It is our emotions that make us human.

Have you ever fallen asleep lying on your arm and awoke in the middle of the night unable to move it? When you apply pressure to any part of the body for long enough, the nerves in that part lose the ability to communicate with the brain. Circulation is also restricted, further complicating things. As the communication circuit between the body part and the brain restore, tingling, burning and outright pain occur and can be quite intense. Numbed feelings are like that, too. If we've gone through decades of our life putting a damper on our feelings, when we finally begin to feel emotions again, they seem out of control. We may be overwhelmed, even terrified, with the sheer intensity of normal emotions. We may think we're losing our sanity.

Suppressing feelings is not healthy. It is not a sign of strength. Being in touch with, and expressive of, honest emotions is an indication of vitality. Today, stop from time to time and check in with your feelings. Get in touch with your emotional self and allow feelings to flow through you rather than bottling them up. When you allow yourself freedom to feel whatever you feel, whether happy or sad or in-between, you will know what it means to be alive.

                                               In the spirit,

                                                  Jane