Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Enjoy your failures!


Success

I have been broken and have failed so many times that my sense of identity has sprouted and peeled like an onion. But because of this, I have lived more than my share of lives and feel both young and old at once, with a sudden heart that cries out just to meet the air.”
                                 Mark Nepo (The Book of Awakening)

Many of us spend our lives in search of perfection; the perfect job, the perfect mate, the perfect look. We may be so focused on perfection that we walk right past many opportunities and gifts that have been handed to us simply because they don't meet our rigorous standards of excellence.

There's nothing like a good failure to push us past our illusions of grandeur. Failure, albeit painful, is a good thing. It jumps us over the hurdle of thinking we're special and better than we have a right to be, and plops us squarely into the same soup as the rest of humanity. And if we're lucky, it motivates us to focus on the near-ground and not the far ideal. One step at a time, one layer at a time, we can then deal in reality with all it's beauty and imperfection.

Most of us fail more than we succeed; especially when we have the bar set on the top rung. If our goal is always to be 'the best', then we will continue to be disappointed in any performance that is not up to that 'very special' snuff. Don't get me wrong, I'm not suggesting that we give up trying. I don't think shooting for the ground is a worthy endeavor. But if we can take incremental steps, and be happy with small successes, we have a much better chance of reaching our eventual goal. Think of a football team that, instead of throwing the ball fifty yards down field on the fragile hope that the runner is in the right place at the right time, you move the ball three yards at a time. Same game, less risk, more likelihood of success.

I think that if you asked most power players, like Bill Gates or President Obama, they would tell you, “Don't be afraid to fail.” You will learn far more from your failures, wrong turns, and near misses, than you will from your grand successes. Don't be afraid to fail, but don't give up trying to succeed.

                                                In the spirit,
                                                    Jane


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