Saturday, December 1, 2012

Where is home?


Feeling At Home

Whether you live alone or with others, home is a place where you don't have to explain everything. It is a place where you can be yourself, for better or for worse, and usually it is both. And, in the home of our dreams, at least, it is a place where you feel accepted, loved even.”
                            Martin B. Copenhaver (Hark!)

When you move around a lot as a child, it is hard to know where home is geographically. I confess to a certain envy of those who grew up in one place and whose parents and grandparents grew up there, too. Their sense of home is always clear and unshakable. Or so it seems to me. They are ever rooted in that special place, no matter where they may go as adults.

For those of us who grew up on the road, so to speak, as military kids, or children whose family moved from place to place with a job, “home” is a little harder to define. Sometimes we live all our lives unable to answer the question that is asked a lot in these parts, “Where are you from?” Or, more likely, “You're not from around here, are you?”

This time of year, we develop an uncanny longing for home even though we may not be able to define where exactly that is. Holiday music lends itself to that yearning. Songs like, “I'll Be Home for Christmas,” and “I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas”, while beautiful, leave some of us feeling lonely and a little empty.

So, if like me, you're one of the displaced folks, we have to learn to make home wherever we are. Especially during the holidays. Some questions to ask yourself are: 'Who do I feel most comfortable with?' 'Where am I most myself?' 'Who loves me, warts and all?' 'If I were doing this holiday my way, how would it look?' Just as the concept of 'mind' is not synonymous with brain, the notion of 'home' is not a geographical location. It is a feeling, and that feeling is acceptance, belonging, love.

I hope you are 'at home' for the holidays, wherever you may be. It helps to have a faith community that supports and accepts you, and friends who love you. Invite them in this year. Extend your perception of family to include them. When we open ourselves to others, home creates itself within the human heart.

                                              In the spirit,
                                                  Jane

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