Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Pride or humility--which is the virtue?


Humility as a Virtue

For many Americans, humility is not only undesirable, it is virtually incomprehensible. Those who don't know its true nature view humility as weakness. But humility of heart is not about bowing and scraping before others, it is about honesty and self-truth. It includes modesty about oneself but is essentially a virtue related to what is, rather than what seems to be.”
                                         Wayne Teasdale (The Mystic Heart)

I'm not sure when we began to have disdain for the virtue of humility. When I look back, the first person who comes to mind to spout bold and unashamed self-promotion was Muhammad Ali, with his 'float like a butterfly, sting like a bee'. Or, Mr. T. who 'pitied the fool'. Or perhaps it was the swaggering Henry Winkler as Fonzie on Happy Days, or even further back into the beatnik era, Edd Burns as Kookie on 77 Sunset Strip. Somewhere back there, our ideal went from the gentle, unpretentious wisdom of Father Knows Best, to street-smart with a biting edge. Now, we see someone who is not blowing smoke as weak-kneed. It is an unfortunate turn for the worst.

Humility is not about weakness. It is about authenticity. Humility gives one the courage to say what is—the good and the not-so-good—and to take responsibility for one's own role in both. A person who is humble of heart, does not brag about his/her own expertise or place themselves above another person. Instead, he/she builds up others and speaks to all people as equals. Our ideal of self-promotion and egotism is both dangerous and juvenile. At least in the days of Kookie and Fonzie, Ali and Mr. T., we knew that their characters provided comic relief and were not to be taken seriously.

I have the great, good fortune to know a few people of exceptional ability and intelligence who have no need to be cocky or egotistical. They have learned that over-confidence is the stumbling block of the proud and that succumbing to egotism is the crutch of the deeply insecure. They don't see themselves as better than anyone else, and they are genuinely embarrassed when they are characterized as brilliant or genius.

Humility is still a virtue, whether we subscribe to it or not. It should be an ideal we strive for in ourselves and expect in our leaders. Think of the people you have the most respect for and try to remember when you last heard them boast. Wouldn't you choose that person to mentor you and not a little Napoleon like, say, Donald Trump? Me too.

                                                   In the spirit,
                                                    Jane

No comments: