Write It Down!
“A schedule defends from chaos and whim. It is a net for catching days…A schedule is a mock-up of reason and order—willed, faked, and so brought into being.” Annie Dillard
I’m one of those weird people who, even though I have a fancy cell phone with a handy-dandy calendar, prefer to write my schedule into a day book. When I was a working woman, it was the zip-up kind that holds all your addresses and phone numbers, notes to self, lists of to-dos, and such. Now it’s just a little week-at-a glance thing that fits into a pocket of my purse. I am so forgetful, and always have been, that if I don’t write it down, it’s gone.
Keeping a calendar is not the only thing I have to do to stay on track. I make lists and sometimes, leave them at home. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve stood in the middle of the cereal aisle, looking up to the rafters, trying to remember what was on my list. I know people think I’m hearing voices. Never the less, if I have made the list, even when I leave it at home, I’m more likely to remember than when I haven’t.
Any effort to simplify life should include keeping a calendar and making lists. We have far too many distractions now to leave our time to chance, and gazing at the rafters is a waste of time. Even retired people, whom everyone thinks have nothing to do, need to be organized about that ‘nothingness’. I have a friend who has twice retired and now is busier than ever. Fitting all her projects, meetings and grandkid-outings into a week is a true juggling act. Used to be, she went to work and, at the end of the day, went home—piece of cake. Now, if I can schedule to walk with her once a week, I feel privileged.
Making lists and keeping a calendar may seem to be the opposite of simplifying life, but in reality, they save time and effort. Once you have written it down, whether ‘it’ is a board meeting, or eggs and coffee, you don’t have to give it another thought. Your mind is freed up for more important things—like creative ideas and dreams.
Keeping it simple,
Jane
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Monday, February 13, 2012
Life is so difficult...Woe is me.
Get Over It!
“The assignment is to get over your self. The assignment is to love the God you did not make up with all your heart, soul, strength, and mind, and the second is like unto it: to love the neighbor you also did not make up as if that person were your own strange and particular self. Do this, and the doing will teach you everything you need to know. Do this, and you will live.”
Barbara Brown Taylor (An Altar in the World)
I had tickets Saturday night to see the Alabama Symphony Orchestra backing up a rock band that covered The Eagles greatest hits. The night was the first freezing cold one we’ve had this winter. I was tempted to beg off; I had a little bit of a scratchy throat from the sudden cold snap and could have parlayed it into a good excuse. Instead, I found myself in the balcony of the Alabama Theater, a restored, turn of the century, ornate, red-velvet opera house, belting out Eagles songs at the top of my lungs. One of my favorites is ‘Get Over It’. The last stanza goes:
“You drag it around like a ball and chain
You wallow in the guilt, you wallow in the pain
You wave it like a flag, you wear it like a crown
Got your mind in the gutter, bringin’ everybody down
Complain about the present, blame it on the past
I’d like to find your inner child and kick its little ass..”
Perhaps it’s a bit harsh; there certainly are injustices in this world, difficult circumstances of growing up, difficult families, poverty, dark stuff, but we Westerners have made our suffering into a religion. We have blamed our current miserable state on our past miserable state for too long. It’s time to ‘get over it.’ We’re still using our misfortune as a reason we should be allowed to succeed regardless of our own efforts and if you don’t believe that, just watch one of the TV talent shows, in which contestants recount the pitiful circumstances of their childhoods and end by saying, ‘This is my ONLY chance…I HAVE to win.’ Please.
I have to say, in all honesty, that I have been one of those unhappy people at points in my life—I didn’t like her then, and I don’t like her when she rears her ugly head now. The problem with whining is that it that it keeps me stuck like a hog in mud. As long as my energy is going into nursing my wounds, real or imagined, I will have none to forge a new life and a new way of being in the world. So, here’s what I suggest—wallow for a while—five minutes, maybe ten, and then get up and get on with life. Just outside that pity-parlor is a world waiting to be discovered.
Getting over my self,
Jane
“The assignment is to get over your self. The assignment is to love the God you did not make up with all your heart, soul, strength, and mind, and the second is like unto it: to love the neighbor you also did not make up as if that person were your own strange and particular self. Do this, and the doing will teach you everything you need to know. Do this, and you will live.”
Barbara Brown Taylor (An Altar in the World)
I had tickets Saturday night to see the Alabama Symphony Orchestra backing up a rock band that covered The Eagles greatest hits. The night was the first freezing cold one we’ve had this winter. I was tempted to beg off; I had a little bit of a scratchy throat from the sudden cold snap and could have parlayed it into a good excuse. Instead, I found myself in the balcony of the Alabama Theater, a restored, turn of the century, ornate, red-velvet opera house, belting out Eagles songs at the top of my lungs. One of my favorites is ‘Get Over It’. The last stanza goes:
“You drag it around like a ball and chain
You wallow in the guilt, you wallow in the pain
You wave it like a flag, you wear it like a crown
Got your mind in the gutter, bringin’ everybody down
Complain about the present, blame it on the past
I’d like to find your inner child and kick its little ass..”
Perhaps it’s a bit harsh; there certainly are injustices in this world, difficult circumstances of growing up, difficult families, poverty, dark stuff, but we Westerners have made our suffering into a religion. We have blamed our current miserable state on our past miserable state for too long. It’s time to ‘get over it.’ We’re still using our misfortune as a reason we should be allowed to succeed regardless of our own efforts and if you don’t believe that, just watch one of the TV talent shows, in which contestants recount the pitiful circumstances of their childhoods and end by saying, ‘This is my ONLY chance…I HAVE to win.’ Please.
I have to say, in all honesty, that I have been one of those unhappy people at points in my life—I didn’t like her then, and I don’t like her when she rears her ugly head now. The problem with whining is that it that it keeps me stuck like a hog in mud. As long as my energy is going into nursing my wounds, real or imagined, I will have none to forge a new life and a new way of being in the world. So, here’s what I suggest—wallow for a while—five minutes, maybe ten, and then get up and get on with life. Just outside that pity-parlor is a world waiting to be discovered.
Getting over my self,
Jane
Sunday, February 12, 2012
What if...
Changing Places
“…the sinner and the saint are just the masks you put on’, Merlin replied. ‘The saint in this life may be the sinner in another life, and the sinner today may be learning to become a saint tomorrow. All these roles are illusions in God's eyes. I am not saying you must force this perspective on yourself. You asked me for guidance, however, and I must show you what lies ahead on the path.”
Deepak Chopra (The Way of the Wizard)
My son, Ian, is taking a class in graduate school on sensitivity to cultural differences. He is learning what it is like to be from a minority culture in America. Even when we don’t mean to be insensitive, as members of the privileged majority, we say and do things that are simply tactless for no other reason than ignorance and habit. I would say that we in the South are especially guilty, except for the fact that I have lived in California and New York City, and as a Southerner, experienced blatant discrimination in both those places. I think it is sufficient to say that majority populations everywhere have a lot to learn about racism and prejudice.
I like to think that there is an outside possibility that we get to go around more than once on this earth plane. In my next lifetime, I may be a black woman in sub-Saharan Africa, or an Icelandic fisherman. Suppose all our souls get a turn at being in the minority. If we knew this to be true, would we act differently? If I, as a white, middle-class American, expected to spend a lifetime as a black person, or a Hispanic person in my culture, might I be less likely to be callous toward them now? Might I try a little harder to be conscious of my present insensitivity and not simply take for granted that the way I see life is the ‘right’ way?
There are important lessons to be learned about ourselves in any incarnation. To learn those lessons, we must first be self-aware; conscious of our thoughts and words. Whether we are, at any given moment, saint or sinner, majority or minority, black or white or tan, we can learn those lessons and carry our expanded consciousness forward. We will bequeath that expansion to the next generation, whether that is our children or us in new skins.
In the spirit,
Jane
“…the sinner and the saint are just the masks you put on’, Merlin replied. ‘The saint in this life may be the sinner in another life, and the sinner today may be learning to become a saint tomorrow. All these roles are illusions in God's eyes. I am not saying you must force this perspective on yourself. You asked me for guidance, however, and I must show you what lies ahead on the path.”
Deepak Chopra (The Way of the Wizard)
My son, Ian, is taking a class in graduate school on sensitivity to cultural differences. He is learning what it is like to be from a minority culture in America. Even when we don’t mean to be insensitive, as members of the privileged majority, we say and do things that are simply tactless for no other reason than ignorance and habit. I would say that we in the South are especially guilty, except for the fact that I have lived in California and New York City, and as a Southerner, experienced blatant discrimination in both those places. I think it is sufficient to say that majority populations everywhere have a lot to learn about racism and prejudice.
I like to think that there is an outside possibility that we get to go around more than once on this earth plane. In my next lifetime, I may be a black woman in sub-Saharan Africa, or an Icelandic fisherman. Suppose all our souls get a turn at being in the minority. If we knew this to be true, would we act differently? If I, as a white, middle-class American, expected to spend a lifetime as a black person, or a Hispanic person in my culture, might I be less likely to be callous toward them now? Might I try a little harder to be conscious of my present insensitivity and not simply take for granted that the way I see life is the ‘right’ way?
There are important lessons to be learned about ourselves in any incarnation. To learn those lessons, we must first be self-aware; conscious of our thoughts and words. Whether we are, at any given moment, saint or sinner, majority or minority, black or white or tan, we can learn those lessons and carry our expanded consciousness forward. We will bequeath that expansion to the next generation, whether that is our children or us in new skins.
In the spirit,
Jane
Saturday, February 11, 2012
What's Love Got To Do With It?
Love Stuff
“The shelves of bookstores are groaning with self-help strategies, five-point plans to improve our relationships or to make ourselves more attractive to the opposite sex. But love is more like an electrical storm than a pension plan…When it comes, almost always unbidden, love will upset our comfortable routines.”
Roger Housden
I’ve tried to avoid writing about love because it is a subject in which I have no expertise. Twice divorced, I obviously don’t have a degree in compatibility. But here it is—February—and we’re inching toward Hallmark’s favorite holiday, so avoiding the subject would be well, hateful.
Rumi, that thirteenth-century Sufi-Dervish, wrote, in my scant experience, the most descriptive and flagrantly inflammatory love poems ever. In his poem, Buoyancy, he wrote:
“Love has taken away all my practices
And filled me with poetry…
…A mountain keeps an echo deep inside itself.
That’s how I hold your voice…
…I am scrap-wood thrown in your fire,
and quickly reduced to smoke…”
See what I mean? He was transported to some other place, his brain reduced to gibbering nonsense. Now, supposedly his love poems were written to God, but really, does this sound like a prayer to you? “We’re groggy, but let the guilt go,” he wrote; “Feel the motions of tenderness around you, the buoyancy.” I’m just saying…
Perhaps the reason one should avoid this sort of raving passion is that it takes your nicely ordered, stale-but-predictable life and throws it to the wind. Your days will fall around you like down from a broken-open pillow, and you’ll never, ever be able to gather the pieces back into a neat bundle. Love reduces and fills at the same time, like a fickle wind in untrimmed sails. Love makes us do really dumb things and feel like we’re geniuses while we’re doing them. Love is dangerous. I think you should run like a scalded dog when you feel that throbbing in your heart that signals your inevitable downfall.
That being said, though…Happy Valentines, everyone,
Jane
“The shelves of bookstores are groaning with self-help strategies, five-point plans to improve our relationships or to make ourselves more attractive to the opposite sex. But love is more like an electrical storm than a pension plan…When it comes, almost always unbidden, love will upset our comfortable routines.”
Roger Housden
I’ve tried to avoid writing about love because it is a subject in which I have no expertise. Twice divorced, I obviously don’t have a degree in compatibility. But here it is—February—and we’re inching toward Hallmark’s favorite holiday, so avoiding the subject would be well, hateful.
Rumi, that thirteenth-century Sufi-Dervish, wrote, in my scant experience, the most descriptive and flagrantly inflammatory love poems ever. In his poem, Buoyancy, he wrote:
“Love has taken away all my practices
And filled me with poetry…
…A mountain keeps an echo deep inside itself.
That’s how I hold your voice…
…I am scrap-wood thrown in your fire,
and quickly reduced to smoke…”
See what I mean? He was transported to some other place, his brain reduced to gibbering nonsense. Now, supposedly his love poems were written to God, but really, does this sound like a prayer to you? “We’re groggy, but let the guilt go,” he wrote; “Feel the motions of tenderness around you, the buoyancy.” I’m just saying…
Perhaps the reason one should avoid this sort of raving passion is that it takes your nicely ordered, stale-but-predictable life and throws it to the wind. Your days will fall around you like down from a broken-open pillow, and you’ll never, ever be able to gather the pieces back into a neat bundle. Love reduces and fills at the same time, like a fickle wind in untrimmed sails. Love makes us do really dumb things and feel like we’re geniuses while we’re doing them. Love is dangerous. I think you should run like a scalded dog when you feel that throbbing in your heart that signals your inevitable downfall.
That being said, though…Happy Valentines, everyone,
Jane
Friday, February 10, 2012
Finding Contentment
Clean Slate
“As you start your program to reduce clutter, the guideline is easy: If you haven’t used it in a year or more, get rid of it.”
Elaine St. James
Americans have gone from an average household of two bedrooms, one bath, approximately 1000 square feet in the 1950’s to an average household of more than 2000 square feet, three bedrooms, three bathrooms, eat-in kitchen, formal dinning room, living room, TV room, 2-3 car garage, and office or library in 2000. And that’s not enough—most of us also pay for off-site storage units.
I remember when my former mother-in-law began giving me dishes, clothes and knick-knacks from her house. She was in her early 60’s and I was half her age. I happily accepted everything she handed out, wondering why on earth she would get rid of such great stuff. Now, when I run across her ‘gifts’ in my own house, I think, ‘oh, yeah, now I understand.’
There is an acquisition phase in life when everything is on the rise—our job responsibilities, our families, our expendable income. We think we need more ‘stuff’ and we do. But what we think we need is way over the top. Have you noticed what young people buy to accommodate a new baby? Besides the crib and car seat, they ‘need’ a jogging stroller that accommodates more than one child and a diaper bag the size of a suitcase, a pop-up play pen complete with musical mobile, a sanitary changing pad, a jumping/swinging child seat, a collapsible bath tub, and the list goes on and on.
Thankfully, we come to our senses. At some point we look at the fact that we have to keep buying ever larger houses to accommodate all our ‘stuff’ and see what a crazy game we’re playing. That’s when the disposition phase kicks in and we start hauling the cumulative ‘must haves’ of a lifetime to the thrift store or the Dumpster. It’s time to get rid of all this stuff I never use, we say, handing a box of grandmother’s china to our daughter-in-law.
There is a great sense of freedom in getting rid of all the things that clutter up our lives. Once the closets are cleared out, we can start on the basement and then the garage, and eventually, all those outside commitments that take up time and resources. We pare down our list of ‘friends’ to only those whom we actually love and enjoy. We begin to understand that we don’t need so very much to be contented.
Getting clear,
Jane
“As you start your program to reduce clutter, the guideline is easy: If you haven’t used it in a year or more, get rid of it.”
Elaine St. James
Americans have gone from an average household of two bedrooms, one bath, approximately 1000 square feet in the 1950’s to an average household of more than 2000 square feet, three bedrooms, three bathrooms, eat-in kitchen, formal dinning room, living room, TV room, 2-3 car garage, and office or library in 2000. And that’s not enough—most of us also pay for off-site storage units.
I remember when my former mother-in-law began giving me dishes, clothes and knick-knacks from her house. She was in her early 60’s and I was half her age. I happily accepted everything she handed out, wondering why on earth she would get rid of such great stuff. Now, when I run across her ‘gifts’ in my own house, I think, ‘oh, yeah, now I understand.’
There is an acquisition phase in life when everything is on the rise—our job responsibilities, our families, our expendable income. We think we need more ‘stuff’ and we do. But what we think we need is way over the top. Have you noticed what young people buy to accommodate a new baby? Besides the crib and car seat, they ‘need’ a jogging stroller that accommodates more than one child and a diaper bag the size of a suitcase, a pop-up play pen complete with musical mobile, a sanitary changing pad, a jumping/swinging child seat, a collapsible bath tub, and the list goes on and on.
Thankfully, we come to our senses. At some point we look at the fact that we have to keep buying ever larger houses to accommodate all our ‘stuff’ and see what a crazy game we’re playing. That’s when the disposition phase kicks in and we start hauling the cumulative ‘must haves’ of a lifetime to the thrift store or the Dumpster. It’s time to get rid of all this stuff I never use, we say, handing a box of grandmother’s china to our daughter-in-law.
There is a great sense of freedom in getting rid of all the things that clutter up our lives. Once the closets are cleared out, we can start on the basement and then the garage, and eventually, all those outside commitments that take up time and resources. We pare down our list of ‘friends’ to only those whom we actually love and enjoy. We begin to understand that we don’t need so very much to be contented.
Getting clear,
Jane
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Staying Awake
Preparatory Steps
“Preparatory steps are necessary in all the arts. They are also necessary in life if we want to live authentically. Every twenty-four hours we are given a new canvas to prime, to make ready for the vision.” Sarah Ban Breathnach
My sewing room is in the basement of my house. I have arranged work tables in the middle of the room and around the walls, shelving for fabrics. I organize the cotton fabrics by color, so that when I begin a new project, I can pull down the complimentary and contrasting colors without digging through bins or drawers. I have intentionally placed my sewing machine on one side of the room and the ironing board on another, so that I have to get up and walk around. Exercise is still necessary and once I get into a project, I can work all day long, for days. By the end of a project, the room is a total disaster, with thread and fabric everywhere. The creative process is messy, but the room still needs to be organized for ease and efficiency. I hate being way-laid by a buried pair of scissors or lost pin cushion. When the creation is finished, I spend a day cleaning up and reorganizing the fabrics to make the work space ready for the next project.
All of us know how to organize our workspace for maximum convenience and efficiency. We are careful and thoughtful about where things go so that we can put our hands on them easily. A friend of mine has stacks and stacks of papers and manuals and prospectuses lining the walls of his office. He won’t allow anyone else to clean up because he knows exactly where everything is located. It may look like one big mess to other eyes, but he knows his system and it works for him.
Our lives outside the office could benefit from the same conscious attention and unwavering focus we give to our work environment. Yesterday, I locked my keys in my car, motor running! It was the second time in six months. I was distracted by conversation with a friend and some guys raising a huge white tent in the street ahead. My focus was not on what I was doing. Luckily I have roadside assistance for such screw-ups, but all of life can’t be part of my AAA contract. Staying in the present moment, being aware, being solidly in my body-mind are preparatory steps for a conscious life.
Waking up in Birmingham,
Jane
“Preparatory steps are necessary in all the arts. They are also necessary in life if we want to live authentically. Every twenty-four hours we are given a new canvas to prime, to make ready for the vision.” Sarah Ban Breathnach
My sewing room is in the basement of my house. I have arranged work tables in the middle of the room and around the walls, shelving for fabrics. I organize the cotton fabrics by color, so that when I begin a new project, I can pull down the complimentary and contrasting colors without digging through bins or drawers. I have intentionally placed my sewing machine on one side of the room and the ironing board on another, so that I have to get up and walk around. Exercise is still necessary and once I get into a project, I can work all day long, for days. By the end of a project, the room is a total disaster, with thread and fabric everywhere. The creative process is messy, but the room still needs to be organized for ease and efficiency. I hate being way-laid by a buried pair of scissors or lost pin cushion. When the creation is finished, I spend a day cleaning up and reorganizing the fabrics to make the work space ready for the next project.
All of us know how to organize our workspace for maximum convenience and efficiency. We are careful and thoughtful about where things go so that we can put our hands on them easily. A friend of mine has stacks and stacks of papers and manuals and prospectuses lining the walls of his office. He won’t allow anyone else to clean up because he knows exactly where everything is located. It may look like one big mess to other eyes, but he knows his system and it works for him.
Our lives outside the office could benefit from the same conscious attention and unwavering focus we give to our work environment. Yesterday, I locked my keys in my car, motor running! It was the second time in six months. I was distracted by conversation with a friend and some guys raising a huge white tent in the street ahead. My focus was not on what I was doing. Luckily I have roadside assistance for such screw-ups, but all of life can’t be part of my AAA contract. Staying in the present moment, being aware, being solidly in my body-mind are preparatory steps for a conscious life.
Waking up in Birmingham,
Jane
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Simplify Your Life
Living Simply
“Year by year the complexities of this spinning world grow more bewildering and so each year we need all the more to seek peace and comfort in the joyful simplicities.” Woman’s Home Companion, December, 1935
I have been reading books on simplicity in preparation for the Lenten study I’ve agreed to lead. One of my favorites is Simple Abundance, by Sarah Ban Breathnach, which contains a daily reading with suggestions for simplifying life. The quote above struck me as something we can all relate to right now.
At the time the Women’s Home Companion published the suggestion that we all ‘seek peace in the joyful simplicities’, they had no idea that the world was about to come apart. It would be four more years before Germany invaded Poland. Americans were digging our way out of the worst depression our young nation had faced. The Companion encouraged women to rekindle the home fires and learn how to live simply and with soul. Times were hard and giving up was not an option. We have seen similar times for the last five years. It is no small thing that people are rediscovering the home garden and shopping at thrift stores; self-sufficiency is making a comeback. The economists fret that Americans are not spending enough money, but those of us out here in the hinterlands know that we are storing up, shoring up the home-front, and learning how to make-do with what we have. We are saving instead of spending, and I believe that’s a good thing.
Even in times of plenty, living well within one’s means is the better part of wisdom. We’ve seen what happens when we create a make-believe society based on the shifting sands of easy credit and sleight of hands swaps and deals. The time has come to rediscover the peace of mind and soulful abundance of living simply. Suggestion for today: clean off your desk top; give away or recycle as much as you can. Give yourself a fresh start by organizing and dusting whatever is left.
In the spirit,
Jane
“Year by year the complexities of this spinning world grow more bewildering and so each year we need all the more to seek peace and comfort in the joyful simplicities.” Woman’s Home Companion, December, 1935
I have been reading books on simplicity in preparation for the Lenten study I’ve agreed to lead. One of my favorites is Simple Abundance, by Sarah Ban Breathnach, which contains a daily reading with suggestions for simplifying life. The quote above struck me as something we can all relate to right now.
At the time the Women’s Home Companion published the suggestion that we all ‘seek peace in the joyful simplicities’, they had no idea that the world was about to come apart. It would be four more years before Germany invaded Poland. Americans were digging our way out of the worst depression our young nation had faced. The Companion encouraged women to rekindle the home fires and learn how to live simply and with soul. Times were hard and giving up was not an option. We have seen similar times for the last five years. It is no small thing that people are rediscovering the home garden and shopping at thrift stores; self-sufficiency is making a comeback. The economists fret that Americans are not spending enough money, but those of us out here in the hinterlands know that we are storing up, shoring up the home-front, and learning how to make-do with what we have. We are saving instead of spending, and I believe that’s a good thing.
Even in times of plenty, living well within one’s means is the better part of wisdom. We’ve seen what happens when we create a make-believe society based on the shifting sands of easy credit and sleight of hands swaps and deals. The time has come to rediscover the peace of mind and soulful abundance of living simply. Suggestion for today: clean off your desk top; give away or recycle as much as you can. Give yourself a fresh start by organizing and dusting whatever is left.
In the spirit,
Jane
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)